Sunday, August 12, 2012

An As-of-yet Untitled Story

       For some time now, Kenaniah and I have been writing a story together, one filled with beautifully rich and well-crafted characters, core-deep themes, professionally classed dialogue, and high scoring, involved plots.
       Unfortunately for you, we've decided to keep that story under wraps for now to avoid any of our masterful work getting stolen and have resolved to post mumble-jumble instead to confuse potential competitors. (Okay, so, truth be told, what you see happens to be what you get, and if it's all mumble-jumble and gobbledygook, then so be it and let the craziness unfold.)
       For a little over a year now I've sincerely enjoyed writing with my favorite little brother--even if it's just so my own craziness can get out a little to stretch and point and laugh at the crazy, upside-down world. Up until this point, I've not been much help posting on this blog, so it may surprise people to see me here, but when I impulsively asked Kenaniah yesterday evening if he would like me to post our story on the family blog he nodded, said 'sure' and promptly began to visualize book deals and movie contracts. Me and my mouth.
       All that is to say, 'here's some randomness and a side of pie, please get a spoon, and be careful not to spill the whipped cream'. We hope you enjoy!

 


Chapter 1: Involving Icky Purple Goop

Once upon a time there was a little boy and he was six years old. His name was Kenaniah. He really liked to ride his bike; he rode it in circles and up and down hills. He even rode it at the park. But this has nothing to do with our story. Yet.
           One day, his sister, Katrina was typing on the computer and Kenaniah came up to her. He was wearing her old manatee shirt that she really, really loved but it was too small for her. He was also wearing grey sweatpants with a really, really, really big hole.
          He asked his sister, “Can you write a story about me?”
          She said, “No.”
          “But you are!” he said and pointed his hand at the screen which read “But you are!” he said and pointed his hand at the screen which read—er, never mind.
          “Oh.” she said.
          He laughed—he didn’t really but Katrina thought it would look good in the story.
          Then a great big purple grapefruit fell out of the sky and hit them both, covering them in icky purple goop.
          “We are covered in icky purple goop!” Kenaniah cried.
          Then their friend Steve Cucumber came over to them. He stared at them. And stared at them.
          “You are covered in icky purple goop!” he cried.
          Katrina looked at him. “Duh.”
          “Yes, right, well duh.” Steve replied, confused.
          “We already noticed the ‘covered in icky purple goop’ problem, now help us fix it!” she said.
          “But I don’t know how to help you when you are covered in icky purple goop!”
          Kenaniah looked at both of them. “Stop saying that over and over and over and over and over!!!!!”
          They looked at him.
          “No.” Steve Cucumber said.
Because we are still covered in icky purple goop!!!!!!!!!!” Katrina added.
            Kenaniah put his head in his hands. “Oh, dear.” he moaned.
            Katrina turned to Steve Cucumber. “How do you wash off grapefruit?” she asked.
            “You mean the icky purple goop?”
          She sighed. “Duh.”
          “Oh.”
          Katrina moaned.
          “What?!” Steve asked.
          “You.” she groaned. “You and your icky purple grapefruit goop!” Katrina put her head in her hands as well.
          “It’s not mine!” he protested.
          “Mumhf grunk fumf muff?” Kenaniah asked.
          “Gerump glup uhn muumfhgook muff muh.” Katrina answered.
           Steve stared at them. “What?”
          “Muumhhf grunnk fumf muff!” Kenaniah said, a little louder.
          “Um.” Steve said.
          Katrina lifted her head out of her hands. “He asked me if I knew where a bath was and I told him that there was one in the bathroom.
          “Ah, very good!” Steve exclaimed.
          So Kenaniah and Katrina both took baths and got all of the purple grapefruit goop off of them and then they went outside and rode their bikes. (And Kenaniah took his face out of his hands so that he could ride his bike.)
It was sunny and nice and warm and they had a lot of fun and nobody got hurt or anything or even muddy.
          Then a giant grapefruit fell out of the sky and hit Kenaniah and Katrina again, covering them with icky purple goop.
          “We are covered in icky purple goop again!” they cried.
          “Duh.” Steve said.

The End (for now)

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